Have you ever been hurt so bad that you cannot trust anyone no matter how genuine or true they are? Well, if this is you, then chances are high that you could be suffering from pistanthrophobia. This is a condition or extreme kind of fear that prevents individuals from trusting others.
In most cases, instances where people can't trust anyone stem from somewhere. It is possible that they may have been heartbroken by the same people they trusted too much. One such trust is breached, especially by people you never thought would ever hurt or harm you, it becomes very difficult to let your guard down. It suddenly seems like you are putting up fences and protecting your vulnerability. In most cases, such people tend to let no one in, and even the little they do, it is only by a small percentage.
What is the meaning of Pistanthrophobia? Pistanthrophobia definition is an enormous fear of trusting people because of awful past experiences. As stated, the feeling of not wanting to trust anyone, where you feel like you have no capacity to do so is triggered by a nasty experience from before.
Most people do not just wake up and decide, 'I can't trust anyone.' Usually, someone they truly counted on, or banked all their trust on failed them and hurt them so deep. The damage may not be evident psychically, but deep down, such people are usually bruised and their emotions left wounded to the point that they imagine the same thing happening over and over.
Is Pistanthrophobia a Real Phobia?
Yes, it is. This kind of fear manifests most when it comes to relationships. In most cases, the person suffering tends to be extremely jealous in a new relationship just because someone else hurt them in the previous one. It could cost a good relationship if not addressed immediately. Most people have lost great partners just because they could not bring themselves to appreciating the difference between the past and present.
Pistanthrophobia as a fear that shows up in moderation can be a good thing. It could guard you from getting into trouble again. However, it becomes an issue when it goes to the extreme. When you don't trust anybody at first, this can be interpreted as wisdom since you take time to know and appreciate the person.
It is only after learning their strengths and weaknesses that you can then let them in slowly as you figure out if they are worthy of being in your life or not. On its own, this fear does no harm. However, its signs and different manifestations could ruin your chances of being happy in any kind of relationship.
How Pistanthrophobia Manifests
It is possible to be suffering from this condition and not know about it. If you spend a lot of time on your own, then you could assume that it is simply a matter of choice. However, there are symptoms that make it clear. Here are some of the different reactions that definitely identify you as one suffering from pistanthrophobia.
1. You Tend to be Skeptical About Each Person You Come Across
Well, it does not matter how highly recommended someone comes. You can never bring yourself to trust them. You will always cast your doubt about an individual, no matter how adored and loved they are. In a crowd of friends, you seem to be the only one that does not embrace newcomers. When new people try to get too close, you become wary of them. You tend to believe that it is only a matter of time before they unleash their claws and scratch you like all the others did.
2. You Never See Yourself in a Happy Relationship
It is especially difficult when the person who hurt you was the one you were dating. When the scar is deep, you tend to think that your end of happily-ever-afters happened. You hardly give anyone else a chance to get close to you since you believe that they will do the same thing. You also believe that happy relationships are an illusion.
3. You Always Overthink
It seems as though your mind is always on overtime thinking about what a person is about to do to you next. You never judge any person at face value or just stop at the first impression. For you, there has to be something deeper and hidden in them. You tend to believe that everyone has a sinister motive that they are waiting to unleash when the time is right.
4. You Are a Doubter
Unless something is so clear and indisputable, it is impossible for you to just believe in its truth. Your first approach is to treat every person as a liar or a potential one. You have become so corrupted that your mind hardly has the capacity to sift through lies and truths.
5. You Are Such a Pessimist
While most people tend to focus on the positive and what could be right even in crisis, you are the exact opposite. You overanalyze what could go wrong with practically everything, even when everyone around you is celebrating and everything is working out well. When asked, you cannot remember when last you were positive about anything.
How is Pistanthrophobia Treated?
Now that you have understood the symptoms and manifestations of pistanthrophobia, the next sensible thing to do would be to figure out how it is treated. How do you trust someone who has never hurt you? Is it even possible that you can teach yourself to trust again? These questions are important for anyone that is willing to change but unable to do it.
The good news, however, is that it all starts with wanting and desiring to change. It is possible to overcome this fear and turn a new leaf. The following are a few suggestions that you could adopt and start your healing journey gradually.
1. Understand What Triggers Your Fear
This is the first step as it will help you to stay away from whatever ignites the extreme fear. Once you know what is hindering you from enjoying life fully with your partner, then you can start working on these things gradually.
2. Remember That All Things Need Time
Whoever said that time heals all things was not far from the truth. No matter how deep the hurt is, time plays a significant part in making you heal completely. Appreciate the fact that it takes a lot of time to heal and uproot what was hidden deep inside your heart.
3. Get Help if It's Too Much to Handle on Your Own
Well, therapy is available for anyone that feels overwhelmed. Surprisingly, these professionals have been specially trained to walk you through the deepest of holes that you will not believe at first. They will help you deal with your struggles and help you find your own light.
4. Invoke Positive Thoughts
It may be time to change your line of thought. The fear of trust can easily be tackled by being positive always. Surround yourself with things, people, and even movies that inspire positivity.
If you are among the many people who have been hurt beyond repair, as many think, then the idea of recovering from pistanthrophobia may seem impossible. Fortunately, it is a battle that can be won. You do not have to miss out on beautiful relationships with people who truly love you just because someone failed you.